SDD (social distanced duo)

It's so quiet in my neighborhood that when a SDD (social distanced duo) are walking down the street having a heated conversation, I already have strong opinions about what they are talking about long before they get to my place. I can't unhear or mind my biddness.
This is plague times, Yo.
Most of the time I stay silent. Sometimes they hear a voice from the bush with a public service announcement. "The word 'theory' has two meanings. You are both correct." #opinionatedprick
Conversely, I recently saw a travesty of audio perception.
The-otha-day, a local codger was walking Northbound and gagging up a lung. He is coughing like he been puffing on burlap cigars and smokin' aspirin. One of those coughs where ya hear a lot of stuff rattling around his windbags; it was gross I'm not gonna lie.
At the same time a noisy car pulled up blasting the latest tunes. Smiling big, a woman dashes out Westbound just as the old dude gets it together. She didn't hear him, he ne
ver saw her, but the ships passed very close in the night. I saw her (in slow motion) mall-walk straight thru Gramp's slipstream of funk. What could I do?
I wish I could have gifted them both masks but we don't have any and they aren't one size fits all. Olive wants them to fit tight. That was a trip to behold.