Buckle up my friends and readers. Hoooo. There is a lot here. Wanna hear a story of a dad and daughter finding each other? Clown dad Dingo here, in Portland Oregon, just found out I have a rad adult kiddo in her 30’s. What? How did this happen?
This story starts with my mom. My mom found out in her 40's that she wasn’t blood related to anyone in her familia. This has no effect on me since the family that raised me are my beloved family, full stop. Family is family. But this knowledge affected my mom quite a bit! Over the years she has sought out her genetic tree and backstory. My grandfather was in law enforcement in San Antonio and it appears that he made an arrangement to adopt my mom as a baby. He and my grandmother gave my mom a good life and education and she never knew that she was adopted. Then one day there was a knock at the door and my mom learned she had 12 blood related siblings who happened to be looking for her too! And the sister my mom grew up with had her own adoption story! Wow, these are hard things to learn after having lived a full life into adulthood through being a mom, and grandma. But being curious about her origins my mom decided to try and find her birth father and any unknown relatives through an ancestry website.
I’m dad to a 32 yo: Scout. This is, of course, bringing on so many emotions for all of us but MY first emotion is: JOY!
We fall in love with our kids when we meet them. I sure did. I was overjoyed to get to say hi to Scout just a few weeks ago and to have her interest in getting to know me, be reciprocated. Both of us are a bit scared and excited. I’ve learned that she’s been on wheels since she was a baby and loves the skate park. She is hella cool, hella hard workin’, colorful, kind, a wild spirit like me; I see my face in her face and my family’s smile in her smile. She likes music, cats, and vegan food. Both of us have been full of questions. First meeting nerves are real but we both think our connection has hope to grow into a life lasting relationship! Keep a good word in your minds for us friends!
The other fun and entertaining part about all of this was telling my other two kids! My teen son got an ear to ear grin thru his angst, and is thrilled to have another sis. My 24 yo daughter had the best line so far, "No way that kid knew her real Dad was a fuckin party clown." (The clown house kid daughter is from here but her humor reminds me of Texas. Biting and brutal.) Two of my kids got to know their dad was a clown. Scout got to feel it in her bones, I guess.
The hardest part of this story is the part where we didn’t get to know each other til now. I’m looking forward, of course, but this is the part that breaks my heart. I never knew she existed and she never knew I would have closed the gap had I known she existed. Her trail to find me went cold a long time ago. The Indiana adoption services didn’t try to find me before she was adopted, no one did. This situation was the perfect storm for our separation. I regret that Scout and I were kept apart but the sadness of the past pales in comparison to the brightness I feel of having a future with my daughter, and her, with our family. We are at the beginning of our journey, I think about her all the time even tho I just learned that she exists. I hope this is where the healing starts. It feels that way.
When we are all ready, we hope to meet! We’d like to convene here in Portland and then close the gap to Kentucky too! Our family is thrilled to make it possible to be in each other’s life. So, we are asking for your help in uniting us with our newest addition to our family. We’d like to help Scout pay for time off to come visit. We’d like to pay for a ticket for our other daughter in Montana to fly here to meet Scout, then for us to visit Scout’s home, and then fly her to see her Texas family as well! Our finding each other is thanks to my mom! Thank you mom! We would like to show Scout all of the people who are now thinking about her very often!
This revelation has changed my life, has given Scout an origin story, and has brought more love into our family, that we have found each other. We hope to strengthen our connection with your help to visit in person! With Scout’s approval (and my mom’s) I tell our story here to you today.
Thank you for reading. Wish us luck!
Here is a donation link to pitch in to Scout reunification. Please type Scout in the comments so we know who it's for. Thank you!
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