Jesh: "You can't keep treating objects like a woman man..."

I was disturbed as my friend "Jesh", invited me to coffee, see sometimes for some reason people seek me out and want to tell me all about what the train wreck thier live is, some for counseling, some because they need to not feel alone, sometimes it's because I'm just a lone clown passing in the night.
This guy said he just wants witnesses to his pain, he told me his awful story of military, losing his kids, cant find a job etc. I was so bummed after that I wanted to take a shower and wash it off.

I re-told his story to Caffeine and she said "Yer doing it to me now!"
I think to take me on a journey that dismal, I need a lot more than coffee as payment.
I think language that expresses a lot of detail into treating people as things instead of individuals is a pretty clear red flag that I would be next.
This friend is huge, blonde, handsome, friendly but also crazed and sketched out.
He acts like an under cover cop who's security has been blown, terrifically paranoid and no fun to be in a hot dog stand with.
He begs change off anyone who passes and when a woman walks by it's the perversion of a speed freak, that sucks because he is also animated, lucid, giving, and when he learns how, loving.
He invited me to coffee and it was excruciating, he noticed how I bristled when he asked people for money when I'm around, I told him that he was often refering to people like they were livestock and I'm not down with treating women like that, he said "You can't keep treating objects like a woman man..." hope he gets it together, I know it took me a long time.