Betcha didn't know...

I've been held to a cinder block wall by a gushing fire hose held by three or four
Baxar County Sheriff's Department Employees.
I deserved it, back then I was a jerk.
To be fair, it was the State of Texas that started it.

A nice fella got busted out in Calamoth Falls with up to an ounce of weed, on his
mug shot you can clearly see he is wearing an Alberta Street Clown House shirt.

My grand father was a homicide detective in San Antonio Texas, thank god he passed
away many years before I was a hoodlum in San Antonio Texas.

Police in North Portland had a man from Kenya in the back of a squad car.
He was charged with battery on a lady.
A clown with night vision camera popped out of a bush to show the police what
had really happened;
The man had gotten out of a cab when a prostitute soliceted him.
He said "Ell No Lede'"
She got mad, started hitting him and a cop pulled up, shining the lights
just as he had her on the ground protecting himself.
It looked really bad for him.
They pulled him out, chucked her in, and never asked why I was in a bush, lookin clowny
at 3am near the corner of Michigan and Fremont with night vision and a beer.
To this day the man from Kenya waves frantically at me when he sees me.
I stop and we repeat the tail even though it's been seven or eight years ago.
We still have never asked each others names, don't need them.

In the ten years that I have lived in Portland, I have not so much as gotten a jay walking ticket.
I've never EVER had an unpleasant run in with the Portland Police.
I know people who have been treated badly (even killed) but they have always treated me with respect.
(I must admit)Often the cops confuse the "clown make up" with "Retarded"and speak slowly to me.

Will Messiahforf Ood shortly before going to jail in a diaper.