That time I showed a tourist how to weed. Tale of a perfect "single serving friendship"

Another single serving friendship in the can. We made a friend. :) She stayed at the Air B we lived in.

We just dropped our new friend off at the airport and soon she will be back with her husband in Korea.

She has been married 2 years and told us she is very independent.

Married life has made her less independent so she took a solo trip to the USA to get her self-power on.

She picked Portland because she read we are weird here. A safe spot for expressing herself.

The first few days she took herself out on the town. She got to know the clowns one night and we hit it off (like we do).
We had a late night together playing cards with my daughter. Then this morning when I asked her what she planned to do today she said

"Go with you I think.". Ok. lol.

She tagged along to our gig, rocked out a bit and enjoyed the shops. On the way home I pointed out a pot shop as we passed in the car.

I told her that's where Marijuana is sold.

Her eyes lit up. "I wanna try that. I wanna tell my husband I tried that he will be so jealous." Back at the house I broke out my stash. I was enjoying hearing her say the word Marijuana in perfect Spanish. As long as she kept talking I was happy to share.

I rolled a joint and packed a bowl. I forgot she had zero backstory about how to puff out so I lit and handed over the doobie first.

I'm really impressed with her English.

It's a struggle especially around the clowns since we use lots of slang, jargon and double speak. I was also impressed with her Spanish. Her nickname back home is "Lil Brujia". She has some Latinos in her neighborhood WOW and she said Spanish words as well as I do.

Last night she asked me to translate her Spanish, Korean name into Scandinavian runes. That was funny.

She sat there drawing on it over and over. She never got the memo that you typically pass it after a few hits. She just sat there puffing and experiencing.

Finally she passed it over, crushed and more than half over.

The pipe was challenging too but she did it up like a champ. We were worried that she could have a bad reaction so we were watching her carefully.

She was fine.

She liked the sensation and we liked that she finally got her political on. After the smoke sesh she was happy to talk about climate, global

economy, our two countrys etc. We talked so long she was almost late for the plane. We offered to take her to the airport.

As we were almost there she asked the windows be rolled down. She wanted to breathe as much clean Portland air as she could before she went home where the air is very contaminated (by China). She also wanted to breathe in the last air of her vacation. She said she will never forget us. I asked her to name her children after us. Just then something in the road ahead burst into flames. Smoke was pouring over the road."Roll the window back up quick!"

Portland is ironic as well as weird. Little Brujia showed no adverse effects from the ganja and made it to her gate on time.

We had a strong goodbye, goodluck to our single serving friend. Before she left she asked if her room was having guests tonight. Olive "Yep, new single serving friends are already there by now."

if you fit this mold, you are one with everything. Go team Fibonacci!

on the Vacay by her damn self.

I just had coffee with an adorable Korean woman that I found in our livingroom this morning.
Her and her Husband couldn't match up their off time so she is on the Vacay by her damn self.
She rented one of the rooms in the Bed and Breakfast we live in.
She is very sweet. Right now her and Olive are making her some goodies out of essential oils. I really dig the look on Korean's faces when I greet them in their own language. It's a look of relief mixed with pure amusement. Korean is an intimidating language for us "Romanized" language speakers but I'm finding it a very beautiful language that I enjoy wrapping my head around.
Also as a trickster it's clutch to know what everyone is saying. I been crunching Chinese, Korean and Spanish for the last few months.
Our new friend said she chose Portland because she read in articles that people are weird here and have freedoms to express themselves.
That is a pretty good review in my book. She bought two boxes of tea from us and is going to bike with us to our gig at Pie Spot Pie shop today at 4. I love doing dignitary duty.

(expletive deleted)

Hi Friends, hope you are having a great night here on this Earff.
I had a pretty good day busking, so did Olive. She had dinner with her sister and Friends on Hawthorne (ginger beer shop across from the Baghdad.) so I decided to take myself out a little high end restaurant I been passing by for weeks. I was curious so since I had some extra scratch I went big.

The place is called "Chez, Sept Onze" at 39th and Division. I ordered two pulverized baguettes split and filled with meat tubes made of the finest pig lips and butts and smothered in a yellow goo, mystery meaty goo and Tomato seasoned with the most exquisite chemical sheen.

It was really good but I don't recommend it (sorry Chez Sept Onze). I didn't have a dinner companion (took the selfie via telekinesis) but I did hear some dinner conversation. As I scarfed down the grossest thing I have had in years, a man was arguing in his car.
He was alone and having a very heated row. I kind of giggled because I often overhear the funniest one sided romantic quarrels watching people freak out yelling at their dashboard phone. One time a couple had the car phone up so high I could hear the drama in full and in installments over days.
I was riveted. Then suddenly the guy got out of the vehicle still yelling. I hadn't realized it wasn't one of those car phones. I don't think he was having a lovers quarrel either. This is what he yelled into his phone (and at the parking lot)

"I saw that (expletive deleted) blocked the (expletive deleted) car, shot the passenger in the (expletive deleted)face but I missed the (expletive deleted) driver, give me a (expletive deleted) break." I deleted the expletives because my Momma reads this here Facebooks and I'm a good son. :) Anyhoo. I'm hearing this and red flags are popping up all over my carny senses.

I'm a professional observer, I'm telling you what I heard verbatim.
The problem with being such a good eavesdropper is there is always a chance of collecting info I really don't want. The last thing I was gonna do was turn around and let whomever that was see me see him finish saying that.
I crab walked to my bike, threw my burritos in the trunk and got the(expletive deleted)out of Chez (expletive deleted)Sept Onze.

tall bike clowns Olive and Dingo

oliveanddingo.com

flies in the pocket

This was fun to observe. 
Huge expensive truck blocking our driveway. 
I decided to watch and see what happens, maybe there was an emergency. There wasn't. It was there all day. 
We could have had it towed but that is not our style. The situation is compelling social studies to me. It's amazing that those trucks come with such hubris. Enough "tude" to leave the truck in harm's way all day without flinching.
 I waited and waited expecting to see a Napoleon type. I wasn't disappointed. 
We don't mind parking in the street, it's worth it to behold the spectacle. Kind of like watching a toddler cut in line, what are ya gonna do right? :)



As far as the clowns are concerned, when someone breaks a convention or fumbles in social blunder, they have fallen into our trap.
We even have a clown jargon for it "Flies in the pocket" Most F.I.T.P.s don't know they are F.I.T.P.s so we can't do anything too colorful or it will blow our cover.
To a clown hustlemaster, that blockade could be a gift.
Like having a free crash test dummy, but we gotta maintain plausible deniability and not play that card if we don't need it.

This would be a great day to start a paintball fight with the neighbors across the street.
If it was night-time, we would paint our butts and stamp a bunch of elephant ear designs all over it.
I like having a free sucker to punch but we don't want to ruin anyone's day.
Also I give em a pass because it looks like he is at work.
I don't like breaking the stride of folks who punch the clock. If it isn't a problem I won't make it a problem. :)

Going with the G P's to the casinos and coast.

My Mom has been visiting from Texas. She hit it off with Olive's grandparents and they all decided to go to the coast for some gambling and ambling. We went along for the ride and had a blast.

I gambled $50 and lost it all but I did get a free cup of coffee and a lanyard. I'm calling it my first $50 cup of coffee mmmmmmmmm.

Fast Eddie is a pro driver and lifelong automotive guy. It was my honor to be his co pilot.

 I kept my eyes peeled for anything Fast Eddie should know about. The sky wasn't overcast, that is smoke from raging forest fires. Today the air is better in the van than outside.

 I also got to hear loads of family history as the eldsters traded stories.

i had fun making this.

Smoke ahead. What is it?

 Now my Texan Mom gets to dip her toes in the Pacific Ocean for the first time.