Thursday, September 18, 2008

waffles...with irony on them!

I'm having a great morning at Muddy Waters coffee house, it's about 7 am and last night I slept out front.
It was a stirring sleep since trucks blow by all night and I'm in the street with them.
Most of the time, I park and sleep on the sidewalks of Portlandia but on Thursdays, I like to get the good WIFI reception
by parking close.
So autos and the occasional drunkards kept me up all night, it was still a good night to be alive.
I thought it was funny that one of the little pods of drunks that walked by my pad at 4 am yelled "WE LOVE YOU DINGO!" really loud, so loud, it woke me up.
I love irony...and waffles...with irony on them.
Yesterday I got to do some Dawg Snax biz with my dog Banjo, we hadn't been out together in a long time and it was fun to work my old company.
Did you know that my ex wife and I own a company that makes wheat free dog treats, I don't make a dime out of it, it belongs to our children and we just run it until they are old enough to take it...or the economy collapses.
Speaking of my kids, I took my boy out to my hunting grounds yesterday as well, he met some of my friends and we ate good.
He was amazing with the potty training and used his kilt well, no accidents all day YAY!
We hung out with Will Workforf Ood, he gave me a briefing on the state of affairs concerning soil, dirt and mud, we also played Wesnoth as Bruce tore up the cafe.
Sarah, our barrista had just quit smoking two days earlier, she had been stressing about it and kept grumbling "I wanna punch a baby", then when I walked in with my baby she didn't punch him...THANKS SARAH!
If she had been on her game, she could have bribed my baby to punch another baby.
Last night I traded with a rock star and got myself some rattle cans to paint my house.
Three mouth breathers and I hung around painting my pad and stinking up the air, my turrantula didn't seem to mind the stink.
Oh by the way, I'm looking for bugs to feed my big ass bug, I went on a date to the reptile store on Belmont, I was going to buy my girlfriend a snake but we ended up getting a big spider, the nice fella who runs the place is going to teach me how to do an insect circus!
No more paying actors, I just will have to keep them from eating each other.
The gig at Rocking Frog on Tuesday was a blast...really, it was a lot like the Clown House in that there was no set list, lots of sound and bike mayhem and there was also fire everywhere.
Mr.Kirtch, myself and the mighty Mr.Bitner got together and played music for hours in the parking lot, all the music and bikes were hooked up to eachother and we are starting to find our sound.
I made a huge ballon sculpture and gave it to my girlfriend, she danced and danced, that girl knows how to move, it's intoxicating, I looked up at her as I was playing a song and she was throwing branches on the fire pit, she was so lovley I lost track of what I was doing to the sensation of falling off a building, I was enchanted to say the least.
Her job was to keep the fire going, shoot the cannon, and dance.
We like watching each other, it's pathetic.
After the bands left and fire was out, the barristas went home and the crowd moved on, it was just her and I. we moved my bike house to a quiet spot and we cuddled.
I'm pretty sure that I ruined men for her, she was treated like crap a lot, I take good care of her and sometimes she cries when I anticipate something she would need or touch her in a special way.
I asked her at the start if she had ever had her heart broken, turns out she had, thats good, she was ready to appreciate me.
I think she is ruining woman for me as well, she has time for me, treats me like a king, feeds me and sometimes I feel like a human popsicle.
I'm a lot more fun since having my warts removed.
The reason I'm saying we are ruining future romance for each other is because the chance of us staying together for any length of time is remote.
We are really different and on different paths, it's possible for our pathes to part later or sooner or if our magic holds...longer.
See, waffles...with irony on them!
I'm just thanking every second I spend with her, I learned that late in my last relationship, at the end I was on SAVOR MODE the whole time, what a drag not knowing if you are solid with someone or not.
I do thank my lucky stars I got to be with M.S. and thus now also being thankful for this special person.
OKOKOK mushy over!
Soon a movie about me will be showing on the silver screen at the Portland Art Musium, I'll let ya know more next week.
Friday is open mic at Essential Elements on 32nd and Hawthorne, 7:00 pm, I really want to see some wiccan stand up comedy!
OPEN MIC TONIGHT AT MUDDY WATERS COFFEE HOUSE 29th and Belmont, it's gonna be huge so sign up early!

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