Good News! I don't have ringworm!

Today I was understandably freaked out looking at my chest in the mirror. Ringworm! Our friends had a bad ringworm incident recently so it's on my mind. I looked in the mirror and lost it when I saw those tell tale signs. 
It wasn't just one, it was dozens of ring shaped marks and a few contusions all over my arms, back, stomach.
 I ran to my partner
 "I'm infested with the ringworms Olive!" 
She took a look and then quickly began giggling. She followed the pleasure trail of clues. 
A couple hours ago she was having a kissing party, I was the furniture. 
The rings are from her facepaint. 
Her cheeks stamped circles backwards all over me. So there ya go. I cured ringworm.

My Darling wife woke me up with a deep massage. That

 isn't uncommon. Over the last decade, we worked out that I put her to sleep and she wakes me every day. It can be pretty spectacular all around. Anyhoo. 
What was special this time was that she was doing it for her not me. It was about maintenance of her band equipment. 
She depends on me to play guitar as we sing for our supper every day. 
No matter what guitar i use (this anything but ergonomic beast is called The Stump) I end up over and under working several muscle groups. Back of fret hand gets one workout, strum bicep gets another. That isn't good to be all wonky.
She found all the guitar related stress parts (and had me hollering) and then prescribed exercises to even out the tone.
I never knew that was a thing. I didn't realize I was even hurting in those spots until it suddenly stopped.
Now I recommend it to ax grinders who sling those things around all the time. My first guitar was an SG copy.
That thing was heavy as a manhole cover. Rock on Donkey Kongs.