Wednesday, November 15, 2017

night club gigs. Last week we did two night shows. Songs, skits and a our famous booby painting.


we did a lovely "adult storytime" shows at Ash Street Saloon and Dante's. 
Big thanks to Feral Drollery and the Bugbees for inviting us to the two gigs.
 Also big thanks to Olive's Dad who met us at the door helping us load in. We were late because I got carded at the door (we had to go back home to find my ID.)


I was a bit apprehensive playing a gig at a place known for surely metalheads. Our happy loony tunes don't exactly mix in with the other acts but we are a functioning punk band. Our songs are pretty heavy for our genera. 
All the songs we played are the exact same songs we play for the kids. 
It could have gone bad but we just owned it and sold it like it's what they came for. I knew we had them during the clapping part of the pig song, everyone (spiked leather, skulls, death metal logos) they were all clapping. YES!!! 
We soon felt very welcome and then sad when we came to understand that this iconic Portland venue is closing.Just like Satiricon, we will be one of the last acts of the venue.


 eating a lightbulb while singing a song. 

 The booby painting: Our date "Indie" was amazing and brave for letting us have some fun with her chesticles during the act. It's our goal to be sexy without being sexist, and to put on a good show of course.
To keep up the mystery, made it look like we didn't know her beforehand. 
Folks were very wide eyed. 
Indie is an empowered woman and a delight to hang out with. We had just met her a few hours prior and we liked her a lot.
I hear we facilitated an autistic man with seeing the first boobs he had ever seen. He is a man in his 30's who stood transfixed on that part of the act. I found out his story because his Mom was there too.
She said they were laughing their heads off watching him watch us.
As Indie's boobs would jiggle so would the man's head in unison.
Outside the Mom said "That was so classy how you guys did that, thank you. He needed that." She said she asked him if he liked the show and he told her. "She has no shirt." Mom said "Yes that's her breast and she is lending it to Olive and Dingo to have some fun, it's not a bad thing." 





At Dante's we painted a lovely lady's chest and made a print of it. The crowd dug it.
 Then two woman in the front row (visiting from a far off country called Bend Oregon) decided they wanted to buy the print to take home as a souvenir. 
Olive decided that their money wouldn't be so good a trade so she  talked them both out of their brichez. 
She would trade her booby painting for a print of one of their bootys. The other lady said "Ooh do me too!"
Olive took them downstairs to the greenroom and painted both their butts then had them make a print. She got a souvenir for herself. Olive walked out of the venue with her painting in hand and head held high. lol So now we have some new art.




 I'm delighted to live in a city that has more than tolerated me performing both kids shows and adult shows (not to mention political activism) for 19 years now. It's often encouraged and never been a problem. We are all about decriminalizing the body and natural body functions. It's very primitive thinking to me to consider any body part "dirty" that doesn't have an dirt on it.  I picked a great town to be a clown.






Monday, November 13, 2017

I love it when things just work out.

I was sitting in a deli this morning having a coffee. Suddenly the door flings open and what I know to be a tweekermerican walks in.
I call them that because they like rocking american flag bandannas. Dig this, I have tons of sympathy for folks with drug problems.
The system lends itself to chemically destroying people and I'm not about to be another victim blamer.
That said, I'm also very prone to getting seasick when sitting next to someone who can't stop moving.
This guy never stopped flailing and jerking around as he sat at a video poker stand right next to me.
I was strapping in for a bumpy cup of coffee. Then he saved the day. He put $20 in, hit the button once, lost it...and I guess that was all his money because he said "I guess that's all my money."
And he split.
To be honest, after it got quiet again I kind of missed him.

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Saturday, November 11, 2017

Waiting on a corner for the light.

Waiting on a corner for the light. 
Another guy standing there says "Hey Clown man. 
I bet you experience things every day that I would never even think of."
 (I'll bite) 

I asked "Have you ever thought about having to shave while rocking clown facepaint and not messing it up?"

 He told me he could recall no time in his life pondering that particular scenario. 

"Well there ya go kid, have one on me, that's how I spent my early morning."

Thursday, November 09, 2017

happy birthday

Olive and I just had a HUGE and very public, embarrassing lover's quarrel.

Folks in the deli were VERY concerned. Wish I knew how it turned out, we got distracted...also we were faking it.



On the way to lunch we strolled behind a couple who were really having a "H.vP.EL.Q." We eavesdropped until they unexpectedly hopped on the #9 bus. So we just carried on the bitchfest like clowns do. We knew our parts, we studied our sources. She was upset with him because he never listens to her (so I made sure to be talking whenever Olive's character was talking).
He was upset with her because...she was pregnant with a manchild's kid, himself. Olive has a great fresh preg face, very tragic. We battled it out until I accidentally won $5 at video poker. I only put in five bucks in the first place so our fake fight was instantly leavened by the healing buoyancy of neutrality surfacing in our little corner of the time and space continuum.

Saturday, November 04, 2017

Republican and Democrat are like Coke and Pepsi

Republican and Democrat are like Coke and Pepsi, easily available, sweet tasting to many, but very unhealthy to all. The crummy part is that more folks are willing to buy Coke and Pepsi than are willing to get informed and politically act in ways that ensure that both the water in the pipes and the leadership of the country are clean and healthy. Y'know, in a way that is a good example to the next generations. It's the difference between being a "symbiotic resident of Earth" and "Humanity, the self collapsing invasive species".

The two political parties are mutated to shine different people in different ways. Just because the Democrats aren't as primitive as Republicans doesn't make them any more qualified to lead the USA.
Democracy is dependent in the assumption of an informed public.
That isn't the case.
People pick the news they want to hear so we have a dis-informed public flying blind.
The public isn't informed enough to vote correctly.
No matter what, both parties are too beholden to donors to be effective representation of We the people.
I still think a random scout troop would run the country better.
I would trust a pack of Cubs to play nice and shoot straight. To them a foul play is a foul play, end of story.
(To be fair!) Soda pop is very good for some things like removing corrosion from rusty tools and cleaning. Transversely if many of the politicians I'm sick of watching were to change vocations to muffler shop janitors, that would also make the world a much better place. :)