Thursday, October 14, 2010

Still no contact with my babys since may28th

I haven't been out of bed when I didn't need to be the last three days or so.Yup you may have seen me doing a show with my smile painted on!
The weight from missing my children is crushing and I don't like hearing so many people talk about Caffeine in hateful tones. People of course ask "Where are you kids Dingo?" After I tell them they think about it and since they know me they call bull shit on Caff and I don't even mention any of the mean stuff she pulls on me.
They all also say "Your kids are gonna hate her for that in the long run."I hope not.

I spent a long time defending that woman, my kids look like her and i love her I curse her bitterness because i miss her friendship and counsel so much.
So it's hard to get up if I don't have to. Caffeine's punishment is the only bad thing in my life and it's a mutha.
She claims i need a year of counseling... I may after she is done with me.
Still who the heck is she to say that about me from the other side of town and without looking?
Counseling is an unnecessary expense and waste of time when it's only being done because a bully demanded it.
I can be spending that time and money investing in a future for my kids, learning new skills or having new experiences.
I really hoped that when we split up that we could be like siblings instead of spouses and keep some kind of nice family dynamic. No matter how sweet or nice i was i always got a painful look/glare/brick wall.
Olive has been so cool through all this. She gets hate mail from them but she keeps a cool head. She just wants to see the kids again and she also wants her man back at full steam. There is always 15% less smiles since May28th the last time i was with my kids.
Since then: no contact... like i'm a rapist or something. She is treating me like she did her Dad. I'm thinking that since she is calling me the same things she called him that maybe she has a problem seeing men who aren't in her life "doing well".
Nothing makes her frown like the sight of me smiling.
I'm trying to be as mature as I can because I have a lot to lose.
About a year after the Clown House busted up... my life, works, romance and career started rising and I have been growing ever since. I love my life more than ever.
Olive tried to call her tonight because we want our life back. Olive is really nice but Caff just started talking at her and not letting her say anything. Then she hung up on Olive. If it wasn't so sad we would have high fived each other. She was actually calling me immature while acting like a bitter brat. Her story reads like Fox news tons of sensationalistic fake news.
I think Olive got one sentence "Hi Caffeine I was just calling because it's been so long and we miss the kids" the rest was Caff stammering and talking at the lady. Caff should be ashamed of herself for treating Olive so crummy when Olive has been nothing but a friend and a great guide for our babies.
For a lady who is so prejudiced about Olive's age she sure got trounced when it comes to "Womaning up" tonight.
She did not sound like she believed what she was sounded more like desperate words shot out so she didn't have to face the truth.
While spurting her verbal confetti she mentioned not feeling safe having her kids at Dads. She eventually gave a large list of hoops for me to jump. I can jump those hoops of course but what would that say about bullying? From what Ive seen this lady's needs will never be met because the root is that she doesn't want my face in her life. I'm around children every darn day,. I have never had a problem.
I have a safe clean house, I don't drive. I have an encyclopedic knowledge of the kids extensive allergies, They have great clothes and bedding. I don't drink or smoke, I wouldn't ever have pot around them and they get loved and read to. What more could you want?
They don't watch videos all day or have to meet lots of new room mates, This summer my baby girl missed out on learning balloonistry from a prodigy master and missed out on learning how to make a living selling paintings..My boy needs his Dad I can feel him call me with his heart and mind every day.
It's overwhelming how many people are calling foul on this. I keep hearing the same thing from our old friends "Control issues" there isn't anything wrong with me, she just isn't in control. That is a good thing since getting out from under her decision stream is what really got my balloon off the ground. Now she is demanding things without even looking at what is going on.
How can she take an honest look at where my life is if the very sight of me doing well makes her so angry?
How can a lady hurt her kids so bad just to hurt a dude that has been really pleasant the whole time. Either she was lying all those years she was telling the world what a great man I was or she is lying now. I'm a better man now than I have ever been.
She doesn't care one bit what I think about SAFE. She lives by a trailer park in a house with ever changing room mates. All the kids grizzly accidents happened at her house. The hypocrisy is insane. I wish she would stop talking so nervous and just let the kids come back to visit. I left their room and clothes the same as it was.
I'm not a deadbeat, I take great care of them and I have never had a problem...that should be enough!

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