Monday, August 06, 2007

optimum

I wish I could stop waking up at 8 after going to sleep at 2-3 am, it comes with stress and of course baby screaming.Caff has been getting the baby out of the house in the mornings so that won't happen, I don't want her to have to do that.
She wants me to be happy because she knows how hard I work for us.
I know how hard she works for us.
This is part of why Caffeine and I are looking at living different places next month.
We went over ten years together, after that we re-negotiated out marrage contract and got a new lease on our union.
Everyone is treating us like were breaking up, someone called me a "free agent" we are still really tight and we have been free agents.
We are still married and we really want to stay that way so why not live as pleasantly as possible.
When I'm writing or concentrating and I hear the blood curdling scream of a child, it makes me lose my thought and go into a kind of shock, by now it's trauma for me to hear that sound, they make that sound ALL day.
This is gonna be a boon for our kids, dog and girlfriend, they will have two houses with witch to leave laundry all over.
I shudder at the thought of living in a tiny apartment, that would mean I failed, moving into a room in a Punk House full of drunks, ditto.
Small digs would be fine for Caffeine, she wants a small place that's easy to clean, and that the only people she has to yell at are people she created.
It,s hard to deal with show biz and kids at the same time, I understand her view.
I want to start another house like this one, one full of tools, art, music, revolution and meyhemI can't start a house like this one without partners, so far the partner pool is piss poor.
Nobody has stepped up to the plate and my existing crew are far too distracted with romance issues to help me on this one, Bizzy chose not to live with the circus at all, it's cool, just need to find some help somewhere if The Clown House is to happen again.
Caff and I looked at housing online about an hour ago, we were astounded by the prices for even a small place a hour away (by car) from our community.
I'ts really creeping me out looking at my options, Caff will have better luck because of the kid angle plus, everyone knows me and my reputation for blowing stuff up and letting anyone with a back pack stay in my yard for a price.
Landlords hate that, I'm hoping to find someone who's never heard of me.
Caffeine uses a clothesline, thats about as bad as she gets, she'll be fine.
I don't know what to do with the dog...we don't know what to do with the dog.
Banjo the dog costs $20 a month and needs a yard, she sells a lot of Dawg Snax for us so we keep her around.

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