Thursday, August 30, 2007

go time

It's go time.
It's the afternoon, thur.a matter of hours until we have to turn over the keys to the clown house.

I have been running on coffee stress and the only good help has come from outside my family.
Realizing at the last moment that I've been carrying usless crap (un used props, pointless furnature) for nothing is demoralizing, if I had known weeks ago this wouldn't suck so hard..
I have had good help, but a few have left me to deal with all this myself and on top of that I have a terror of landlords.
Caff asked for them to get us a dumpster and she declined, we have always defended them to the media but in the end they kind of are tools.
They want us out by Sat. because another family is moving in, that means that they are gonna let someone move into a house that needs tons of work, thats lame.
They let us sit in the dark plenty and never told us what we needed to do to get our deposit back. don't want to let that go unanswered.
They want us out by Sat. Caff cant move in until Fri. thats a stress doer.
The yard was a mess because of all the moving and I found the (8) news guy taping a crime scene of debris laying in the yard.
I did him the favor of letting him tape me smashing my chest of drawers.
People think theres gonna be a show here by us, not really, we're just dealing with this dragon, the end in in sight, the tail has a spike.
It's not all bad at all, my new place is great and I was moved in quick by Jay and Toaster.
I'm having a wonderful time with my kids and with the crew as the house gets more and more empty.
Today in the Oregonian they write that our neighbors next door are glad to see us leave because of our bon fires and nudity, thats so frikkin funny, nothin is more ungodly than a nude body...well mine anyway

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

new surroundings soon, how wonderful.

Someone stole a bike from us, it's easy now that we cleared the bad bikes, the yard debris acted as camo for the expensive stuff, just the back yard, obstacle course was a brutal deterrent for bad guys.
They stole“Jane's II”one super tall bike and a stupid thing to steal when drunk, the guy took off at about 4am, I could hear him giggling as he rode off on it. I was too exhausted to give chase, I had done two gigs and was in the office tending wounds.
Eventually Ood found the bike near some kids with a $20 tag on it, Ood took the bike back just in time for me to determine that we don't need that bike and it can go home with a foster human, we will dig those bikes up when we get the new Clown House started..
The “yard sale” is taken as a free box by most, thats ok. all our extra stuff is moving away without us, thats good.
Most people move “With” their belongings like suckers, then when the moving company sell all the stuff by the pound to the mafia, they lose their minds because they lost all their crap.
We can get new crap anywhere...everywhere.
We tried to get rid of some garbage in dumpsters last night but everyone was out at 2am looking at the lunar eclipse.
It was hard to do anything “stealth”unfortunately, our mission was hard won.
As I was returning home I reflected on the current state of affairs in my far so good.
Today I was up early after getting to sleep late,lots of work here unfolding the house.
I'm mostly doing it all myself and it's HARD, luckily I have some tight friends backing me up, Ood is always close and ready for action, The Grope wishes he could ride all three of his bikes at once, Kitty Litter helped me through some tough times just by having tougher times and Doc keeps building bikes...i like that.
Thats who I roll with every day, my kids are around here a lot too.
I also roll with the traveler kids, two came in today one was really sick they look young, I gave her some juice and food and she got better, they are camped in the empty garage.
I helped Doc take the Clown House Bike shop treasures to his house, he had tons of tools and now he has more.
I made a set of tools before he took the shop away, I wound through his basement passages unfamiliar with the room and got the feeling that I would be exploring another house and new surroundings soon, how wonderful.
I remember moving into this Clown House and relishing the fact that I didn;t know my way around and most of all I didn't know where to buy beer.
Today I sent entirely in the saddle, going here to do this, there to dump that, Agent Lapis from the Sprockettes came over and we took the above mentioned stolen bike to her house for safe keeping.
I can't wait to get into the new digs, I'm gonna sleep for a whole day.
The kids are gonna live in a safe, happy, child proof environment away from welding, Boooze bottles, knife throwing, wild dogs and all the whole Pandora's box full of fun.

Monday, August 27, 2007

Doc at the gig the other night

Doc don't usually go to our gigs...I asked him why he went to this gig (besides that we were working with cutie pie super band Kiss Bank)he said he wanted to see for himself how we manage to mangle the fleet.

Doc builds some nice bikes, he is our resident builder, today he took a good part of the bike shop home with him and many bikes.
This dude will be outfitting us with mayhem for a long time I bet, he loves taking 5 perfectly good childrens bikes and welding them together, giving them a flash paint job and then handing it over to the nearest chaos clown.
The tear on his clown face stands for the tears he sheds when we smash one of his creations (or any other bike)into folded metal scrap.
He takes no time to get any rig back on the road he is a real champ.

really fun day in Portlandia

OK the de-housing has gone full tilt with the looks like "house vomit" all over the front. People come and pick through it, I charge some and not others.
I put lots of the houses stuff out there and I sent the day playing guitar as the locals combed through piles of stuff.
I also took runs with big double long trailers full of bikes and other things destined for storage with friends or distant dumpsters.
All in all it was a great day to be alive and really fun, the Grope found a big branch full of plumbs that we tied to the bike and brought home.
I like getting rid of stuff, we found the remote by smashing the couch.
It was fun to smash my bedroom furniture into little pieces while drinking morning coffee, the folks down at the cafe just looked stunned, like I was having a fit when actually I was giggling.
Nothin cuts stress like breakin stuff, the bowling ball is a basher, I made a real crime scene out of my couch with it!
We got some good leads on the housing dilemma so thats sweet and I got to hang out with my kids who are both really delightful people.
I still really miss Caffeine, we don't move in the same circles (or time zones)as much.
Rocket Montana and I went to Safeway and she got some steaks and other goodies including a giant pack of hot dogs that we have been eating on.
Ike and the food not bombs folks brought us a big box of produce for what may be the last time, I pulled out some money for gas and thanked her a lot.
I rode a lot today played music in an empty room and really appreciated my life,this city, the weather, my friends and family, it's great to be alive.

Sunday, August 26, 2007

Billy talked to Ood
When he was done he had spouted 30 seconds of circular logic, all-be-it a hilarious 30 seconds, it somehow took “Twitch” 5 minuets to get it out.


I'm hunting for space for some of the remenants of the Clown House, mostly the two kids dog and Caffeine.
They have been having a hard time finding new digs.
As you may know the Clown House is taking a Gentri-vacation from Alberta street and we havepretty much scattered to the four winds.
Ood and I have rented apartments on Hawthorne street, Bizzy and Banjo Dave have gotten rooms in St.Johns and all the traveler kids are finding new dumpsters to sleep in.
I tried to give away or at least send off some of our best bikes but I didn't get much response so I'm gonna saw them into little pieces and give then to the scap metal guy.
The big thing is Caffeine, the dog and the kids, it's only a week from splitsville and it's a little unsettling.
Caff thinks she has some good karma for letting so many folks stay with us over the years, hope shes right.
Any of you guys have any ideas as to where to put the fam?

Saturday, August 25, 2007

too much stuff

We had much more supplies than I ever thought, some of it 10 years old.
It just keeps unfolding like a flower full of papers and props.
It posses a question, Where the hell is all the circus gonna live?
Where do we put the big mirror and all the big props?
I had some offers but little follow through.

Friday, August 24, 2007

we had a new Bizzy for the gig!

You know how we like to portray each others characters...
Last night for the Kiss Bank Show at Voo Doo doughnuts, the part of Bizzy Bawdy was played by Mis Kitty Litter!
She did a great job!


Torch passed

The real Deal

Thursday, August 23, 2007

Will and Caff are solid

The yard was too full of cigarette smoke, drunks and bums to be any fun last night, I guess I gotta put a stop to it.
Most of the people who live here hid inside as the party grew louder and drunker, what a bunch of a holes.
Rocket was nice enough to rub my neck as I worked online and she drove them to an empty lot,.
The music is great, spectacular actually, but the people doing it are bums, it's sad I wish they could get it together and work for my show.
I have no reason to respect them at this point, I'm doing all the work.
Speaking of work, good thing we have a dumpster, it was raining sewage yesterday mornin.
See a guy who lived here liked collecting jars of rotting cabbage for some reason, when he left, he stupidly flushed it down the commode, now the drain contains a Brazillian pounds of foriegn debris.
So the upstairs toilette cant drain, fills with #$@^* and when someone tried to fix it, sewage rained through the floor and all over the kitchen table ruining a fresh box of donated food and forcing us to lose the kitchen table.
Will Workforf Ood and Caffeine really took one for the team by dealing with that, they are the most loyal people to the cause (and to me) that I know.
Robin's bike was borrowed by travelers and never returned, anyone have a small 24" mountain bike for the kid?

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

just had a little thing with music

Caff is culling years worth of stuff separating the wheat from the chaff regarding her belongings.
She sends boxes and furniture to the portch and I drag it to the yard, pulverize it with a bowling ball, hammer, ax, bat, bike and then arrange the crime scene in the dumpster to save the most space.
The Grope and I just had to jump into the dumpster after I saw that it had been loaded poorly.
It was a bad Jenga and space is expensive.
One of the things Caff found in her stuff is the copy of Queen's sheer heart attack album.
I said “F 'Yeah” and popped it into the ghetto blaster.
Caff didn't think it would work but I forwarded it to the other side and then it played at least as good as a tape that I know has been laundered twice since we got it.
As soon as the first track came on I was reminded of when I first got the tape, it was DOPE!
1999 April 1st we moved the Clown House to a wonderful spot in the Mississippi neighborhood.
The tape came with an entire families stuff that was left over from the last tenant.
After a few days I unburied the tape from one of the countless piles of humanity that I was shoveling into a dumpster.
I played the heck out of it then and now as I'm filling my own dumpster I will play it till it's the last entry. This is the first time since this started that I shed a tear.
This damn Queen tape from the 80s, it reminded me of the Clown House middle age
It was the soundtrack to us running through a new house full of prospect at the dawn of a new century.
People picking out rooms and filling drawers, I built a bike shop, hope and skill was everywhere.
The Clown House had become a bad ass force with power and grace.
Back then the Clown House was more than I had ever hoped for and I was a drunk idiot, I had no idea how cool it could be with the focus of sobriety.
Still one of the songs brought me to sitting in the tub of the new house with two half empty beer bottles bobbing and singing along, totaly oblivous of the adventure I was embarking on.

I wear sun glasses year round

I like this weather.

tilted axis.

It took me more time than usual to get my head together this morning,I had a sad night.
Imagine working all day and giving your all with the hopes of eventually taking a ride on a candy apple red, super charged, roller coaster with your name on it, then imagine you actually are lucky enough to see a candy apple red, super charged, roller coaster with your name on it,and then at the last moment it turns into a pile of wet newspaper stuck to a bus bench.
Thats poetry for what I dealt with last night, nobody's fault.
Caffeine was really nice to me (“do right by your mate and she will do right by you” has been my experience) she has a gift of healing touch and wise words.
I woke up at 4:20, staggered to the cafe and grabbed a coffee.
Race car with no driver!
I sat down next to the old sage and the guy from “Nam” my favorite fellas to hang with first thing in the morning.
I got into a doozy of a conversation with the Sage about the amount of water on the planet, why is there so much?
His theory is that long ago the Earth came very close to Mars and siphoned the water of Mars in some outer space vortex.
I thought his opinion was wonderful AND incorrect, his stuff is heavy on the “Christian Bible as a historical or scientific document” drivel, soon as I hear any bible reference (other than geographical) I am suspect.
His was geographical; the Euphrates's river and the Tigress river defining the boundries of the garden of Eden.
He had me until he mentioned the bible stuff, bad science if ya ask me.
I think the water came from a big dirty snow ball from space slamming into a primordial planet Earth that was at the time, full of volcanoes.
I bet that's why we have a tilted axis.
Not a bad conversation to have early in the morning, amped out on pot, dumb from coffee and getting over an emotion hangover.

I'm listening to Jethro Tull's “Thick as a brick”album and getting ready to start a killer day.
I just needed to begin with a musical, pot of coffee and a good outlook.
I think I have it together now...
See ya on the street!

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

the Alberta street Moving Van

There ya go, cost much less to get rid of all your stuff than to move it, I'm following the trend that all my friends did and purging the whole mess.
It all came from here in the first place right!

I hope nobody squats our dumpster

The dumpster is here and boy is it grand, The Grope wants to be the man throwing most of the yard stuff away
I'm letting him, I'm kind of layed up with injuries got doing gigs.
The summer gigs come with burns from pyrotechnics and sore musles from being all day on a tall bike.
The Baby Battle Bikes have been really battering us.
Rocket Montana has been hanging out here, helping with the baby, making us all breakfast and singing a lot.
No news on a pad for Caffeine, Yall pray for her, she needs it.
She needs folks to give her positive thoughts because thats what we are doing.
Some kind of Appalatian mountan jug band has been squatting the yard for a few weeks.
They drink like fish, burn stuff and have really loud mouths.
The band also plays music all night that comes from the soul.
Iv'e been giving them conflicting instructions for fun like
"Don't drink in my yard" and "Here some money for your beer, will you play in the yard tonight?"
One of them eats bugs.
None of the clocks in this house have the right time, only the amount of time since it was last unplugged.
I keep both my computers on rotating world time zones, I like to live with the time in New Deli or Nebraska.

Monday, August 20, 2007

got a dumpster

I just ordered a drop box (dumpster) for all our smashed furniture, props and belongings, it sucks.
I wish there was a better way but if I don't do something, "The Grope" will burn it all.
This whole moving thing sucks actually, I wish we could just stay here.
I suppose it will be good to find a different slum lord, this guy won't help us and we will be using $200 of the tshirt money to pay for this, it's the landlord's responsibility, but the cards are stacked against us, were just clowns.
I really hate that we sold all those shirts and even printed them ourselves just to pay a trash company.
The bright side is that Alberta street gave us a way to make some cash, all we gotta do is print more shirts, thats great!
Caffeine and the kids still have no place to live and the clock is ticking, it's less stress than I was under this time last year so I'm counting that as a blessing.
Caffeine is a very positive thinker and karma is huge for her.
I think she will make out better than all of us.

The news paper was here yesterday doing a story about me and a glossy bike mag was doing a story about master bike builder "Doc" who has been making lots of contributions to our fleet.
Anyone want to buy a slightly over used giant tall bike thats rusted to a fence?

Sunday, August 19, 2007

from Liz

Dingo, IT"S HERE!!

In case I haven't talked your ear off about it in the last 4 months, it stands for Breaking Assumptions and Barriers for Equality!
The women in Portland are sick of living in a supposedly unique subculture that bears all the misogynist, racist, and unchecked power tendencies of the culture that we're trying to undermine. We have planned three days of good, hard music, workshops and fun to get things moving in a different direction. This is about PUNK and METAL and FEMINISM and DESTROYING OPPRESSION.

Friday At the Ranch (NE 15th and Emerson 8*24*07
Sleepwalkers R.I.P. Tandemnation Cull (1st show! Totally badass!!!)
Landlord Sick Sick Sister

Saturday at Liberty Hall (311 NE Ivy ) 8*25*07
12-1 D-MASC (Dudes Making Sandwiches) will provide lunch for those of us about to bust through a day of workshops (email me if you're interested in cooking)
1:15-2:15 Consent 101
2:20-3:20 Gender Caucus'
3:45-5pm **making punk communities safe from violence & aggression***

Saturday at SATYRICON 6PM 8*25*07
Scary Bear Massive Meat Split Anon Remora
Order of the GASH The Vonneguts

Sunday at the "Jerk Store/Dork Store/counter-revolutionary" house (6315 NE Rodney @ Holman)
1-2:15 Women, Alcohol & Punk (all genders)
2:30-4 Rebel Boy: Treason to Patriarchy is Loyalty to Humanity!! (male only)
at In Other Words Bookstore
12-1 Riot Grrrl and Beyond
1:15-2:15 F.A.T.A.S.S. PDX sizism workshop
2:30-4 Women of Color in Punk/DIY Panel (Osa of New Bloods & Melissa of Order of The Gash)

at the "Pink House" 4805 N. Albina (& Alberta)
4-6 pm Consensus Meeting Fascilitation w/Andrea Hamburg or People's Co-op
7pm "I don't wanna work hard, I just wanna dance hard!" Dancing as expression workshop by the Sprockettes
9pm BIKE IN MOVIES!! Feminist Film Nite! featuring a premiere of Nickey Robo's "the Politics of Dancing" 2007

Post this everywhere, get it on your myspace, tell everyone you know, but most importantly:
SHOW UP!! and don't get too drunk at the shows to make it to the workshops!
IF you need: directions, info, help, clairvoyance or want to HELP call me at 503-247-1261
or email me, but phones are better!
see you there!


The fire department came calling

They said we have been a lot of fun and they don't want to be the "Heavy" but we cant just burn all our possessions in the yard.
Upon closer inspection they found that we were only burning clean wood and they instructed us on how to burn safe and according to the rules.
The Grope told me that it didn't help that I had made several piles of burning ashes all over the yard.
I was pretending to be looking out the window of a DC-10 over L.A.
Within an hour the Grope and all his friends had made the fire pit legal and restarted the blaze.

Friday, August 17, 2007



street speak

Going up and down Alberta street has been taking longer than it used to.
I went last night to get a coconut popcycle and everyone on the street had
to stop me and tell me thier point of view about gentrification, they were also telling me about
great times had at the Clown House.I thank those folks who have supported us all this time.
It's sweet to hear the good stuff, the opinions, I don't care much, they have no idea what I hear all day.
Bonaroo got a good look as she hung out with me yesterday, I'm sure she caught that everyone was asking the same question all day.
"So did ya find a place yet?"and "So where are yall all going?"
answers lead to more ditto questions...
"Yer splittin up???'Why?"
When I have no answer then being asked over and over makes the not knowing worse.
It's crazy, I was digging a hole and some guy came up to me and got angry with me for not smiling and giving him a song and dance.
I told him I was working and didn't have time to get on a tall bike for him, then he told me off.
I'm so glad to move on.

more shots from Bizzy Bawdy

This is the "Grope" chopping down one of the uprights that we used for a high wire.


I had a couple of fun days but for the most part, living here is a ton work that I don't get paid for.
I went to bed at 3:30 am after taking care of the house all day and now it's 7 am and the baby has woken me asking for all the things babes ask for.
Most of the child care help we get , we have to pay for so most of the time it's Caff or I doing all the work.
We will be so glad to get a nights sleep eventually, we earned it.
They need a new place to live come the end of the month, it's getting a little close to the wire, I'm going out today to look for them.
With the kids in a 100 percent baby proof environment, she will get better sleep because they can roam around.

What an awsome birthday party!

It lasted two days and now it's time for the rest of the chapter to end so another one can start.

Thursday, August 16, 2007

Destroying our house. The end of the Alberta street clown house.

Classed out. 
The rent went up an extra $300 a month.
 The neighborhood has changed and unfortunately we can't cover it. 
We decided to take ourselves out in an epic destroy the clown house party.

It was good for us and good for our neighbors who also came to lend a hand.

My daughter grew up here.

Now it's over. It was an amazing 10 years.

If it's ever needed again we will build it again. 

just humans tearing down a stage set up

from J on the R

Hello Listeners old and new,
A new episode of DIY, Portland is about to be born. This month, we're
talking with midwives, doulas and moms about a do-it-yourself project
as old as human history. You'll hear stories of home birth and
unassisted birth, along with music from the lovely and talented Ali
Ippolito. Fair warning: you will also hear some sounds of mamas
grunting and babies crying. Tune in to KBOO Community Radio Thursday @
10:00am or listen at your convenience by following the links at (this episode should be posted by the
end of the day tomorrow).

Thanks once again to Brian Kramer for his audio skills and to Nick
Jaina for our theme song. Special thanks to those of you who signed up
on the mailing list at the Zine Symposium.

If you'd like to order a copy of the "DIY, Portland" zine, simply
respond to this email and let me know. You can also pick it up at
Powell's Books, the Waypost and many other locations around town. Stay
tuned for some exciting DIY website information coming very, very
Thank you all for listening,
Jule on the Radio

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

The End of the Clown House!

If she must die then we must kill her ourselves!

Come over today and hang out with us, at dusk we murder the Clown House set, stage and big props, we will be cutting down the high wire poles and assaulting the whole shebang.

Bring fun stuff if you like, buy a shirt, have some food, hang out.
I was trying to think of a way to go out with some class and the best I came up with was taking an ax and bashing all our stuff to pieces, It makes perfect sense...It's my birthday!
I imagine if enough folks turn out I will have to play some tunes and the rest of the gang will fall into a show.

crunching down the clown house

This house has been a circus house for a very long time, there won't be another one for quite some time so what to do with the supplies?
As a huge institution we needed lots of stuff to run it but we wont next month.
The dishes will be sold out front along with cans and cans of other art stuff and house crap.
We will be getting a dumpster and I hope the landlord will pitch in too.
Caff and I looked through a bunch of stuff, I'm glad to see it go.
This is the end of the Clown House (today, my birthday)the last act.
I'm looking forward to new stuff as the Clown House Circus as we will be called and all the stuff I need is "lair" equipment and thats all found all over.

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

My favorite band

Johnny Punchclock!

Changed My passwords again...just to be sure

You can have the old ones:

the lighthouse keep

Remember I told a cryptic story of casting a spell that ended when I finished the Ramp Of Death stunt?
Well it was called "The lighthouse keeper" I invented this spell to help me cope with changes that are happening in my life.
I won't bore you with the what, the who or the how, but I will tell you it also incorporates a painting.
It's a glow in the dark painting of a lighthouse.
To me the lighthouse represents Working where I live, It's a warning of danger, It means security during the waves of emotion that dominate my being during this heavy transition.
Yesterday I took a room in the top of a huge house off Hawthorne street.
Ood and his girlfriend Kitty Litter took a room under mine, I'm glad they came with me, I spend too much time alone as it is.
The room I took looks exactly like the inside of the lighthouse I painted, it's the first place I looked at and it happened right when I asked it to.
I feel fortunate to know enough about time, space, history and magic to make my way through the world while pretty much having a great time, or at least working towards happy trails.
It's uncanny how much my new lair looks like the painting, the winows match and it's isolated high above the tree tops, I'm told music can be loud as I want at that elevation.
The next spell will deal with how to be a good father and husband while living away from the main brood.

in tents

The Climate Convergence is done, wow that was in tents!
We spent days living in tents on the fair grounds near Scakamawaw Washington.
At 9:30 am on the dot, "Horhay" from the Underscore Orchestra pulled the big, purple bus up to the house.
We loaded all the big bikes, and huge props.
An hour later we were done and an hour after that, Will Workforf Ood was ready to go.
I went with Danger and Uncle Jay in a truck full of circus props, we left that afternoon. Jay has a history in that part of the country and was glad to help us do the U.S.O. thing for a bunch of hard core activists in his home land.
It was a long car ride, (ick!) this year I went to Texas, was driven all over, had a van for a weekend and joyrode it myself all over Portland, and now went way out into the boon docks in a truck full of red necks who like Ska music..
I'm not used to that much fossil fuel use, it was kind of cool and kind of nauseating. Remember, I used to drunk drive a fuel truck all over Dallas Texas for a living, my hands have gas on them too.
Funny, the whole reason for the convergence is to save the river from a gas compan.

We got to the fair grounds in the middle of the night, I couldn't find my family's tent in the dark, I was cold, tired and confused..
I walked into a livestock hanger of some kind and saw the shadow of my bike in the dark moon lit room.
I grabbed it to take it with me and as soon as it moved I could hear the sound of flat tire on floor.
my bike was flat and I couldn't see what other damage might have been done, I remembered when the drunks here at the Clown House screwed up all the bikes last year, that got me really mad.
Phil calmed me down a bunch by telling me it was gonna be cool and that the bike was ok and my family was safe and dry.
Jay on the other hand, thought he would calm me down by asking as many stupid questions as they could, "Hey Dingo, do you like chainsaws?, Dingo why are you crying?"
He also likes saying half sentences like, Hey!...I had a-a friend at me grinning)..."
I was so mad smoke was coming out of my ears, I was looking forward to cuddling with Caffeine and Bonaroo, instead I got Uncle Jay and Danger's skateboard.
I made a pillow out of my guitar an slept like a dunce, I hate camping.
The next day we got up at dawn, I found my family, they were cool, my kids had a wonderful time.
The Drop Out bike club had a booth in a livestock barn, I was happy to have them work on my bike, they do great work.
Chops walked up hansom as ever, I was stoked...until he walked right passed me and Rev.Phil picked my bike up.
"Do you know how to work on bikes Phil?"
"Sure I mess around with them."
An hour later the bike was again full of air and had a new tire, Phil started working on the brakes and gears, I could tell he was experimenting so I let him, kind of like when you let a baby play with your car keys.
On a creepy note,Phil hit up my girlfriend to do porn for him, that almost ended really bad for him, I'm a beast to say the least.
We did the show and slew, the stunts all went over greatly, we kept the kids happy while big meetings took place, the locals LOVED us.
We play well in the sticks, they want us to come back.
We did the "thing", made some friends and went home.
Along the way, Uncle Jay took me on an industrial tour of how Longview Washington hates the environment.
Miles of pipes and factorys, buildings full of lumber and smoke.
We passed a place called "The Mint Farm" where a farm was bought by a chemical company but kept the name.
Now the Mint Farm is a sewage treatment plant wow.
I got home praying that my family got home ok, it's my way.
I looked at the yard and knew it would be one of the last nights of the Alberta Clown House.
Micheal the yard guy,did a great job taking care of the house while we were gone, he showed up from Beeville Texas and suddenly I don't know how I survived so long without him.
You know there are roving gangs in this neighborhood, they beat up Will and some other friends, Micheal and I seem to be immune to them no matter how many come up on us.
Micheal attacked a whole mob of them (they were breaking into cars)and frikkin WON.
I like that we got to go do a gig is such a remote local, I took some fun bike rides with Bonaroo, had a great time watching the pack of feral children running amuck and made some good friends.
I really wish I could have had more time with Caffeine, theres always next year, I hear the town wants to see the Clowns again and of course the mighty Sprockettes.

Monday, August 13, 2007

St.Johns dreamin?

I was in St.John's neighborhood on the way to the gig, I said "whats this place?" and Jay the truck driver said "Dont'cha know the darn hood you been talking about livin in?"
Well it looks nice, I would want to live just off the main drag in a house that is blocked by buildings so sound just lingers rather then broadcasting welding and blue grass sounds all about.
Click the title above to see a story the local St.John's newspaper did about me.

Friday, August 10, 2007

shuttling out

First shift away, they all left on the big bus destined for the Safeway parking lot at 10:30.
They are shuttling out to the gig while I stay behind and go with the equipment.
For the first time in months I'm alone in the Clown House, I don't know what to do with myself.
I decided to watch Matlock and eat a sandwich, the next shift isn't due for a few hours and my ride is an hour after that.
I don't like to leave the house alone, there are some real jerks out there.
The Grope has been nice enough to help out with security and house stuff, the dog tore a pad yesterday.
As I was making my sandwich I looked down and noticed my cheese was Pepper jack.
I don't have any pepper jack, where did that come from?"
I looked at my hands, I just tore cheese chunks so I wouldn't need a knife.
Before that I was painting,...painting with the same colors as Pepper jack cheese I guess.

already rented

so the deal with the house I was looking at didn't work out so well.
We can't get into the house because it was already rented.
I was upest about it a little but the community around there was REALLY disappointed.
I was just kind of a dull, crappy feeling knowing that the farther from this house I go, the less tools, equipment, belongings I can take with me.
See if the new joint is in this hood, I can take my drawing table, desk,bed, all the paints and other electronic gadgets.
A new place far away or worse, living in a car would mean I have to ditch most of it and live out of a back pack.
Iv'e done it before but lets not make ant negative mind mantras, we will be fine.
This was just a silly set back, our new digs are soon comin and it will all be ok.

Right now I'm sitting with Ood, looking at old tapes and designing the set list for our gig in Astoria.
"No fire" is the rule at this venue. It's an outdoor gig and this is forest fire country so when the script calls for "Fire" maybe we instead should imagin the word "Nekkid".
So big challenges on the horizon but we are happy, healthy and up for it.

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Next gig Sat. Night click here!

Skamokawa WA. wow now thats playing in the sticks!
I hear the town is really mad at a chemical/fuel company and have donated the use of the local fair grounds for us.
I can't wait!

a great video showing some of my best friends and I doing what we do.

I remember giving someone my torch and thinking, "Just this once, who will notice I'm handing a random fan a pole full of fire, I gotta get my darn hat!"
and it turns out to be the leading image!
Watch what you do, people are watching.
Click the title to see the clip.

new house ,new crew?

My friend's dog died, it was sad.
I took a bike ride with my buddy so he could talk about it and feel better.
On the way back a voice called out"Hey are you one of the Clowns from Alberta?"
I stopped and went back, there was a violin playing and I saw a group of people sitting around a table having a birthday party.
The woman walked up to me with her hand out and said "walk with me....".
She took me on a little walk past some heavily gardened houses pointing them out one by one.
"This is Rachel's house, you helped her with a bike a long time ago, she owns that house now."
She showed me lots of houses and introduced them as an "intentional community" it was neat.
We wound around the block and she showed me this big house with a two car garage and a long winding back yard.
"I think the clowns should live here."
It's a nice place.
They said to go talk to the Potter who owns it and lives across the street, they say he likes us.
I would go meet him now but I need some loyal, undistracted, partners so I know how much I have to offer for rent.
I don't want to live with any of the folks who are waiting for me to do all the work, they suck.
Quality friends come soon enough, I took the last of the current clowns (Will)and Dave,the banjoist to see it, they were stoked.
The new name for the show will be "The Clown House Circus" and if you think you have something call, write, or somehow contact us to set up an interview/audition, this is a great time to hop on, people split right when we were getting most successful, the world is your oyster.
Wish us luck!

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

Bizzy Bawdy takes all the best pics

I was admiring the photos on my blog and noticed that all my favorites are from Bizzy.
I don't know why she is crating Capt.Shirt and hiding a cake.


I spent a few hours dressed as a Home Bum last night.
I had plenty of stuff to wear, all I had to do was look around the yard.
The hard part was finding a bike thats under 5 feet tall.
So many folks have left that all that remains of them are the clothing too heavy or unsightly for them to wear I had enough textiles to go custom.
The Clown House, Yard Tribe scattered to the four winds leaving lots of sweet contributions, nasty trash and a smile on my face.
The exodus happens every year at this time, I was glad to see them go and I will miss most of them.
Why look like a bum?
I was hunting for the gang who robbed my friend, I didn't want them to know I was hunting them until it's too late.
I come from a place where brutality is a way of life, the bottom of Texas, thats why I'm here to escape.
This gang to me are made of pudding, when I come down on them I gotta be carful not to kill any of them.
I was a bum hiding in the shadows of Alberta street many years ago too, I remembered that last night as the bugs were bugging me.
Last time I put the costume on I was scouting a guy named Ziggy, he was playing a gig and I didn't want anyone to know I was there.I ended up being glad I did.
The other reason I dressed as a bum was because I had to get rid of lots of trash left by old roomates, failed inventions, and my bringing home things we don't need but love to look at/throw from the roof.
Last year this bike bum took my stuff without permission and busted it up really good, I had to find his squat to get it back, it was a hassle but I wasn't mad, I just made note of it.
I recently saw this fella ride by the house, I got a good enough look at him to copy his clothing, bike and style.
Last night I was him but instead of pulling stuff out of the dumpsters I was throwing stuff in.
I talked to a lot of people and have narrowed my search for the gang down to about three blocks where they live.
Maybe I'm counting on my blog being obscure enough to tell my friends whats up.
I'm better stop talking about undercover ops.

Monday, August 06, 2007

Ramp of Death

Merica sporting a Bike Diaper and announcing the Ramp Of Death!

While doing the Ramp Of Death maneuver during our show the other day, I had a wonderful moment.

I had cast a spell for a week to get some matters dealt with emotionally and mentally.
Oh yeah, I use the wizard skills whenever I can, been my religion for 25 years.
I decided my spell would end when I did the Ramp of Death part of the Red and Black show.
When the time to do the stunt came, I found myself soaring way up in the air and careening full speed at an inferno.
Will hangs out under the ramp 10 feet below, I can never hear what hes saying because the fire is so loud.
I looked around in one of those moments where time flows slower in the blink of an eye.
The crowd was cheering, Bizzy and Merika were taking care of business the light from the blaze plus my distance from the ground gave me a wonderful view of the whole scene.
I noticed the spell as it ended, I shivered and remembered asking for it to end on it's own.
then it was over, we did the rest of the show according to the script and went home. I had a mini meeting with some friends, then I knew my spell worked and told them about what I was up to.
I feel much better, Chops Mom took some video, I think to scare Will's Mom.
It's linked to the title above.

I changed my passwords

You can have the old ones
Buenas Nochez


I wish I could stop waking up at 8 after going to sleep at 2-3 am, it comes with stress and of course baby screaming.Caff has been getting the baby out of the house in the mornings so that won't happen, I don't want her to have to do that.
She wants me to be happy because she knows how hard I work for us.
I know how hard she works for us.
This is part of why Caffeine and I are looking at living different places next month.
We went over ten years together, after that we re-negotiated out marrage contract and got a new lease on our union.
Everyone is treating us like were breaking up, someone called me a "free agent" we are still really tight and we have been free agents.
We are still married and we really want to stay that way so why not live as pleasantly as possible.
When I'm writing or concentrating and I hear the blood curdling scream of a child, it makes me lose my thought and go into a kind of shock, by now it's trauma for me to hear that sound, they make that sound ALL day.
This is gonna be a boon for our kids, dog and girlfriend, they will have two houses with witch to leave laundry all over.
I shudder at the thought of living in a tiny apartment, that would mean I failed, moving into a room in a Punk House full of drunks, ditto.
Small digs would be fine for Caffeine, she wants a small place that's easy to clean, and that the only people she has to yell at are people she created.
It,s hard to deal with show biz and kids at the same time, I understand her view.
I want to start another house like this one, one full of tools, art, music, revolution and meyhemI can't start a house like this one without partners, so far the partner pool is piss poor.
Nobody has stepped up to the plate and my existing crew are far too distracted with romance issues to help me on this one, Bizzy chose not to live with the circus at all, it's cool, just need to find some help somewhere if The Clown House is to happen again.
Caff and I looked at housing online about an hour ago, we were astounded by the prices for even a small place a hour away (by car) from our community.
I'ts really creeping me out looking at my options, Caff will have better luck because of the kid angle plus, everyone knows me and my reputation for blowing stuff up and letting anyone with a back pack stay in my yard for a price.
Landlords hate that, I'm hoping to find someone who's never heard of me.
Caffeine uses a clothesline, thats about as bad as she gets, she'll be fine.
I don't know what to do with the dog...we don't know what to do with the dog.
Banjo the dog costs $20 a month and needs a yard, she sells a lot of Dawg Snax for us so we keep her around.

Sunday, August 05, 2007

I wrote Eric Bang about a jackass

Hey Eric,
Julia got here...and I'm ready for her to leave.
> She came, name dropped "Eric Bang" and then
> got drunk, invited creepy friends to stay with her
> and keeps congradulating herself on what a
> great house guest she is.
> Do you know this person?
She said that when she was a kid, her bus left her
at a cafe we were at.
Story goes, we laughed our apples off at her and told her what we did for a living.
She said it inspired her to get into show biz.
I have yet to see an act or any potential for one just
loud and boozy.
it's a pity, she's a real charmer
> Everything else is ok.
> \Dingo
he wrote back,

"I thought I might have to warn you about her. She
said she got kicked out for bringing some guy home.
Told her she should have gotten kicked out for being a
guest who invites home other guests. SHe hung up on
me and havn't talked to her (or care to) since. I was
avoiding giveing her your address and tried to direct
her to the spot on the beach I was staying when I was
there last.
Common sence told me.... If I want to sleep
with a lady, I won't bring her in as a extra guest but
find my own place. DUH!!!!
I aslo heard she was drinking and I know
that is frowned upon too. Her friend Gabby though was
a nice guest and always helped and wasn't full of
herself. She got thrown out of Minniapolis recently
too. Maybe she's just dumb."


Saturday, August 04, 2007

dirty south ravers

click above to see who we are rolling with tonight at the Red and Black Street party.
We are bringing Cyclecide who have bike powered carnival rides, our show and then the Dirty South Ravers from San Antonio.
They gave me the street to entertain the masses with and I'm just gonna rip it up for a few hours.
I hope Will Workforf Ood is ok after getting jumped for his rent money and weed.
He is a strong fella, I'm sure he will be fine.

Friday, August 03, 2007

Will got robbed, it sucks.
He was leaving the Clown House through the back gate with his friend , when a bunch of people in masks hauled off and belted the dude and ripped off his backpack.
They had guns and the whole house is freaked out.


So the Hula hogs built and sold two tall bikes and thus had enough dough to get back to the Hog Farm in California. I'm really gonna miss a couple of them.
Two f them I won't miss at all, they were rude jerks, unhouse trained and ungrateful.
They are young and stupid so I didn't tear thier heads off, I just won't havet them as guests ever again.
My frinds the Dirty South Ravers (from San Antonio) made it to town yesterday and treated us to some video wildness by setting up 4 projectors and showing cool visuals all over the house.
I don't know how well they will go over at the Red and Black, the Portland Anarchist community are notoriously grouchy but that might just be the ones on Mississippi ave.I'll be with the groove.
Here are some words for the Clown House Glossary:
Pack Rat: Someone who has more than 6 pet rats and no home.
Banker: Someone who leaves an investment of festering garbage in the basment and then moves out.
Collections agent: Someone who breaks into the house to get some valuables forgotten in the pile of garbage they left in the basment.
Gadget: Peson who isn't on meth but still dissasembles all your stuff at all hours of the day and night.
Hippy who is used to using people, when they say "It's all good, expect it to be all bad.
Cereal Killer:person who eats a whole boxof your cereal at one sitting.
I was cleaning a box ogf old zines and comics when I found some development sheets for a zine we were making called Nightmare Roomate Magazine.
Above are some of the Glossary terms that went with some of the problems at the old Clown House.
See yall at the show this Sat. atr the Red and Black Cafe!